Tag Archives: march for europe

If Only We Could All Be This Productive When Pissed

Can EU Feel the Love Today? Well I hope so; there are so many people here spreading it.

It’s a Saturday afternoon, there I am sat up in my nice comfy bed, a world of possibilities on my laptop, when I remember it’s the march today. March for Europe. On the one hand, I could catch up on this week’s EastEnders/First Dates Abroad/maybe do some work, on the other hand… the guilt overtakes me. Gotta go to the march.

Bit of a fail. When my dad, my sister and I arrive, the march is pretty much over, but better late than never. We make it to the speeches in Parliament Square, and are surrounded by love and solidarity. We just came to say we love EU. And so do some others…


Sinead O’Connor walks past us with a banner saying ‘Nothing Compares 2 EU’. Okay, maybe it’s not Sinead O’Connor. Maybe it’s just someone with really short hair. But still… love everywhere. Until my dad starts some chants of his own. Amongst the peace, and the solemnity, and the unity, and the power of positivity, my dad screams at the top of his lungs, ‘HAAAAANG BORIS JOHNSON! HANG THE BLESSED BJ! OH, HAAAAAAANG THE BJ, HAAAANG THE BJ, HANG THE BJ, HANG THE BJ!’ (For the record BJ if you’re reading, which I’m sure you are, he doesn’t actually want to hang you, he just likes The Smiths’ ‘Panic’ and his own creative take on this. Don’t take it personally.) We get some very strange looks. A boy who feels sorry for him looks at him nervously and says, “that’s a good one.” We all know it isn’t. I make it clear I am not associated with him. I am a pacifist, and all I want is peace and unity, like this guy…


Every now and then, we catch snatches of the speeches, and cheer. Strong, powerful female speakers, filled with energy and zest for life and, above all, hope. Only problem is, I can’t hear most of what they’re saying. But the bits I do hear… wooooooooooo! Yes! Totally agree! One of the speakers has been fasting for Ramadan, and speaks with more power than most non-hungry and thirsty people, two of the speakers helped set up the Facebook events, and then combined them, to create this march. One of them tells us, like most of us, when he heard the news of Brexit, he spent the night at the pub, drinking far too much. Whilst under the influence, he thought it’d be a good idea to make the Facebook event for the march, woke up the next morning, saw how many people were attending, and was like, “What have I done?” A great thing, that’s what.

It’s an empowering feeling, standing side by side with so many people sharing your beliefs, the collective voice, the amazing feeling that WE ARE TOGETHER with each other and with the EU and with immigrants who have been made to feel so unwelcome. When you hear the horror stories of the increase in hate crime since the Brexit result, it’s so easy to despair and lose all faith in humanity. But not here.

Here, the sun is out, the people are out, we are all singing Abba’s S.O.S. in Parliament Square and, for some reason, not feeling quite AS hopeless as we did before. Here we are, strangers united to fight to remain together, no one more important, or with more right to be there, than anyone else. As one man’s placard says, ‘We Are All Immigrants’.


I smile at him, “I like your banner!” He nods, with the same expression on his face as above. He poses there a long time, waiting for the cameras. Maybe he doesn’t feel like smiling, I guess it’s not the most happy of times.

Also not cracking a smile, Winston Churchill. Despite what BJ claimed, looks like Churchill does want to stay with the EU after all. Here is the undeniable proof:


Towards the end of the speeches, one of the men who organised the march asks us all to sit down. “I didn’t really think this through,” he admits. “Not really sure what I was going to ask you to DO once you’d sat down.” But it’s nice. Like one big solidarity picnic, or yoga retreat. Don’t want to sound shallow/opportunistic/like I’m undermining the seriousness of the issue, but there are quite a few good looking men here, too. Perfect chance to meet my soulmate, we have so much in common; we both want to stay in the EU… Except most of them are probably gay/with their girlfriends/not interested. It’s okay, I’ll just download Remainder once it’s out. “It’s a very young crowd, isn’t it?” says my dad. A very white crowd, too. At least the section I’m in is. I guess I’m not really adding to the diversity of it either, unless being ginger counts.



Also, a very dressed up crowd. Didn’t know the EU flag was so fashionable. My favourite is this guy, with his sparkly blue beard with the gold stars in. I want to be this guy.



Who knows what the future holds, in EU fashion, EU make-up or the small question of EU membership? For anyone who says the people have voted out, it’s a democracy, get over it, a democracy is not fair if it is based on blatant lies and lack of information, and I am not getting over it just yet. It’s not like being a sore loser over a game of football or monopoly; we are talking about a monumental decision here, which will affect the futures of us all. So maybe protesting will make no difference whatsoever. But doing nothing certainly won’t. Whatever happens, I’ll be there for EU… Written a song and everything, verse two inspired by Bill Bailey, watch out number 1 spot.


I’ll Be There for EU

So no one warned you of the weakening UK
The vote’s a joke, we’re broke, now we cannot stay
It’s like we’ve got no hands left on the gear
When you’ve heard lies, racism and the
Politics of fear, but…

I’ll be there for EU
(When Gove makes us loathe him even more)
I’ll be there for EU
(When May sends you out the door)
I’ll be there for EU
(‘Cause you’re there for me too)

You’re still in bed at ten post-Brexit blues aren’t great
The more you read and watch, the more people you hate
At least these immigrants now taking up less space
Means you still won’t get that job
You didn’t apply for in the first place, but…

I’ll be there for EU
(When Gove makes us loathe him even more)
I’ll be there for EU
(When May sends you out the door)
I’ll be there for EU
(‘Cause you’re there for me too)